Wednesday, June 22, 2011

*What does it mean to....honor your feelings ?

So often I would hear, ''you must honor your feelings'', but how to do that, for me, was something that took me a long time to figure out. So I write this piece in hopes of helping those, who do not know how to honor their feelings, keeping in mind this is my experience and yours may be slightly different.

Honoring your feelings is an important part of the process in healing, along with releasing stagnant, old, energies and emotions. learning how to honor your feelings, is to learn how to heal with intention and purpose. It also helps in dealing with experiences that trigger negative responses in you.

In order to honor your feelings, you must be conscious of what you are feeling when you are having an experience. So although you may be feeling extreme grief over the loss of a loved one, or deep feelings of be-trail, because you were cheated on, you may be crying hysterically, depressed, lethargic, completely enraged, the list is endless, but the goal always remains the same, you need to say, yes literally say out loud or fully consciously in your head, whatever emotions you are feeling. List them. Acknowledge them.

 If you are crying...say to yourself, ''I feel sad'', ( don't say ''I am sad '' because this implies you are sad when really you are just experiencing a feeling of sad in that moment. ) Say how you FEEL.' I feel sad', 'I feel hurt', 'I feel sooo pissed off, I could explode'. That is honoring your feelings. Saying and being conscious of how you feel is honoring your feeling. This may sound very simple and it is, in theory, but it can be very difficult when you are actually experiencing feelings of strong emotion.

As you are honoring your feelings do not expect that you will instantly feel better. You are working something out. You are releasing energy that needs to be released in order to heal from the experience. This is why you are experiencing those emotions in the first place. 

What you can expect is when you finish releasing the energy or the feelings that you were feeling, is you will feel better, once you have calmed down, being aware consciously of how you were feeling and knowing there was good reason for it, will bring to your consciousness how much lighter or calmer you feel having released or honoring your feelings, no matter how strong the emotion was.

You will find yourself healing much quicker emotionally after practicing this for some time. It is okay to feel what you feel, just know it will pass, and it is for good reason. It is releasing old and present energy that no longer serves you.

Here is quick technique I picked up along the way.....When upset emotionally over something, picture yourself up on a bridge watching the water flowing beneath you, under the bridge. Imagine the water flowing as your present emotions, acknowledge them, see them, feel them, experience them and watch them flow past you but not physically affecting you, just being a witness to their presence. Honor what ever emotion is flowing through you and it will release itself that much quicker.

Honoring your feelings is the only way to fully release emotions in a healthy way. If we resist what we feel or keep it bottled up in an attempt to not explode, it will backfire every time as emotions pile up until they have the chance to be released, so practice the water under the bridge technique and be witness to all your emotions the good one and otherwise.

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2 comments:

  1. Feelings is still a difficult issue for me. As an incest survivor, for too many years I was shut off from my feelings except for numbness and rage. Those two I knew how to do. Learning to honor my anger so that it doesn't become rage has been a journey of progress which I will probably never get perfect. Thanks for posting this.

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  2. Patricia, I know exactly what you mean. I had some of my situation validated with a confession, but then some of my family said other things that I KNOW ARE LIES. My spirituality is such that karmic return is a bitch and for them it is even worse because they will be judged on the other-side. I do not believe in hell, but they do!!!

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